God,
I'm really lost.
Lost in the sea of my emotions and my actions.
Sometimes how i feel is not how i act.
I need help.

I really don't know what i'm feeling these days.
Frustrated? Reckless? Restless?
I need someone who can help me here.
I guess i need time to think through things.
Alot has been going through my mind...
I need You, Lord.

I wish i can hide in Your arms and never have to worry about anything,
really.
I hate to take initiative.

To you.
I know you've been trying very hard to match up.
I'm really sorry if i had put a strain on you.
My life has started at such a pace,
I never thought that i would meet you,
least to think of spending my life with you.
I'm really afraid that you'll be hurt,
and that's why i'm keeping everything neutral.
The last thing i would ever want,
is to make you tear.
I'm really sorry if i appear frustrated and all,
I need God to guide me and lead me to love.
[God is Love.
Love is patient.
Be imitators of God.
Be patient. - Joc]
I don't want you to change yourself to make me happy,
all i want is you be you.
Simple.
I will have to work with God regarding everything i'm feeling.
Be strong for me, will you?
I just need to go through this process.
I need God to help me learn to demand less.
I need you to shower me the grace to go through it.

[Just as we are learning new things about people each day,
so do they learn new things about themselves. -Joc]
I've learnt something about myself.
I really need to have someone stronger than me.
Mentally, Spiritually, Emotionally.

I've been the spiritual pillar at home all along...
I'm tired...
I really am...
I'm so gona break under all these and cry...
but no...
Joc has been through worst...
I need to hang in there...
I have to...

[When we keep our minds on God,
God will keep our minds at peace. - pastor]